. You think of pirates as being all smiley. Actually, they’re all Somali... I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got run over.Inside a Russian woman, there’s another Russian woman.I was in the park the other day, watching a man feed the birds. After a while, I said to myself, “I wonder how long he’s been dead”.I have a friend who keeps ingesting helium. You should try it ... people speak very highly... Dear Hallmark:Roses are red, Violets are blue.Your cards are shit And your channel is, too.And the award for film of the year goes to: Cling.Cling Film.The difference between a nurse and a patient? Well, the nurse actually has a higher chance of leaving the hospital aliveלייקAnd so, 101 Dalmatians all fell asleep. Oh, wait, they’re ordinary white puppies riddled with bulletsThese bacon sandwiches are delicious, said Pooh. Aren’t they, Piglet?Piglet?At her husband’s funeral, the woman couldn’t stop smiling. Finally, one of her friends asks her why she’s so satisfied. The new widow. “Why?” He asked. “It’s putting me off,” I replied. “Oh, okay.” He smiled. His hand continued to rub from my leg. Each stroke, he came closer to my pussy and distracted me more. I encountered another player and at the exact same time, Daniel squeezed my pussy through my panties which immediately put me off my game. “What the actual fuck Daniel?!” I yelled as his hand continued to squeeze and rub my pussy. He placed his other hand on my breast and gently caressed it through the cotton. For some strange reason, I was enjoying it. I knew it was wrong, but it just felt so right and so good. His lips pressed against my neck whilst his hands worked my pussy and tits. I tilted my head up and moaned softly into the microphone. Daniel hitched the bottom of my nighty up and pulled my panties down whilst his other hand cupped and rolled my breasts around. He brought his lips away from my neck and glimpsed quickly at my bald and wet cunt. The lips were swollen and moist as he rubbed his index.
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